Walk out of the office-there are Quest people there-they’re getting laid off. I chat and tell them I just went through that but I have a job now. Walk around.
What the bleep about “What the Bleep”
Looks like I’m on a 2 week or so post schedule. I think I lost one along the way in a forced laptop shutdown. No worries. I guess you could say, that as a blogger who doesn’t get read, it doesn’t really matter how often I post. I think I said it best early on-“I’m looking at this as a way to externalize my life.” It’s also nice to be able to remember the events in my life that would otherwise slip past in memory.
OK, so what’s happened the past 2 weeks-I went to Chicago for 2 days. My mother in law is in town. Went to a Touchables show outside in Oregon City last night, picked up school and church friends at the airport Sat. Erika rearranged the kids’ rooms. Busy working-it’s tough going right now. Gamelan is good-we’re working on several Lou Harrison pieces-I’m pretty solid on them, but I’m a pretty solid player and my parts aren’t that complicated. My job is to act as an anchor. Trying to get the boys into the school routine. Need to workout and do t’ai chi, move to the next inner development thing.
The Chicago trip was too short-redeye Sunday, afternoon flight Tuesday. We got into Chicago at 5-I laid out in the lobby until 7ish, wandered around trying to find a breakfast place, ate, went to the office, worked. Meetings, then out drinking ’til 12. Up early, more meetings, plane ride home. Whew! Erika made me stay home from gamelan. Nice to meet everyone, though.
The world spins as usual, and makes its journey around the sun, while the sun makes its journey around the galaxy. We are approaching fall, and school, and the time to move inward with the seasons. The Michael thought and filling the earth. Temperance is coming.
In news, pray for the trapped Chilean miners-they have a long road ahead. The economy is in mixed territory, but only if you look at corps-it’s been in the tank for regular people all along and didn’t improve at all as the “economy” did. Then there’s the egg recall, the Glenn Beck rally and the Pakistani floods.
I watched What the Bleep on the plane ride back. Bleh. Fuzzy-headed crap. Fu*kin’ Ramtha BS. I like Marlee Matlin, though, so that was nice-though she did come off a little credulous. Some of the science was on-a skosh dated after 4 years, but it’s still Unity garbage that presupposes a bunch of inner development that the majority of people haven’t done and aren’t willing to expend the effort to do. 500 years from now, maybe. When you say “everything is one”, and “your thoughts create reality”-these are truisms, but unless you understand what lies behind, above, around and underneath that, they become dangerous concepts that lead to credulousness, egocentrism and lead you away from the work, among a host of other nasty side effects. This is why the Steiner work and program are much more effective-you have to do the work, gauge the results, and understand the limitations. The inner work should NEVER have a negative impact on your outer life, and you should NEVER talk about it with others, and you should ALWAYS keep your moral compass.
Sh!t like Ramtha does-saying you’re channeling a 35,000 spirit that doesn’t incarnate, doing the cult thing, in it as a money-making proposition-no, no and no. Your path is incorrect, you’re misleading people. Lying is one of the bad things-you need to come clean. Chopping up interviews to support your viewpoint, no. The thing that tipped me off was the inclusion of Ramtha among a host of scientists-that made no sense. You really can’t link science and spirituality-you can use the method of scientific investigation in a spiritual context, but the 2 realms are too different to use the tools and materialistic focus of science. That way lies Ahriman.
The problem is that this stuff fills a deep need in modern people to find a way to get back to a spiritual focus rather than a materialistic one. And the necessity to link the two-this just isn’t it. The problem is the inherent one in modern people-wanting to get the benefits of the work with actually having to struggle and make the effort required to get there. I’m lucky in that I’m motivated to do the work, and know that the journey is the goal. I’m also lucky to have some of these abilities already developed a little, and a good discerning nature, which is super important. Hopefully I can make some progress this lifetime and be able to teach others. I’d like to be able to make a living at it, but I’m not overly concerned about that.
Listening to: Rage Against The Machine, Brian Eno, AC/DC, Brian Eno-David Byrne, Henry Wolff & Nancy Hennings, attack attack attack, Amethystium, Suicidal Tendencies, George Clinton, mystified, Vapors (off on random from the storage unit), Rush, Peter Gabriel, Brian Eno, Dephyer (why did I pull this crap off of Bill Nortman’s computer???), Roger Eno, Pere Ubu, Steve Roach, Marco Lucchi, Gentle Giant, Steve Roach
2010/8/25
In London, walking along the tracks, watch a train derail into another one.
At a school thing, Elli is there and I get a peek.
2010/8/24
Erika has me cleaning the carpet in the living room. I start on it, go around a big box and onto the floor. Start complaining about Fox News.
2010/8/23
At church, Emily is speaking. Getting settled, arranged-Lu Wrede passes out big maps of cemeteries and when people died by year.
2010/8/14
Go to a Peter Gabriel concert with the boys-we’re side stage. I go up to the top and look at the set, as they get on these moving cages that go all over the hall. The show is over, and we leave via backstage as they pack up and unload for the next show. Go out into the parking lot and walk up the hill to our car.
Walking up to work-I’m in a shop. Girls are late and running. Go in and the back room is a mess because they took down all the Christmas decorations. Put my stuff down nd start organizing things.
Little Fluffy Clouds
I’m sitting here with cold feet. For 2 reasons. One, it’s cold in this corner conference room-2 walls are windows, and it’s cloudy today. I have my jacket on, but no socks. Socks are in the big pile of clothes next to the bed. Also, I’m working on this thing and it’s not going, and I need to work on it. We switched repositories, and loading it up into Eclipse is a pain. A big pain. I was able to get it done, for the most part, but it’s a massive timesink. Plus there’s an Oracle thing, and I’m nervous, and it didn’t fail, but it didn’t speed things up either-well, maybe a little… It’s cleared up a bit-now onto little fluffy clouds and a blue, blue sky. Maybe it’ll hold and we’ll get to see the Perseids… Erika cleaned the bedroom and set Salem up with a bed, which she didn’t voluntarily sleep in. And kicked the boys out, though Colin came back-poor guy.
OK, so Ted Stevens died in a plane crash. I think I met him once back in the 70’s-my mom went to school with his secretary (or something). He was the king of pork, but dying in a plane crash sucks. And another dead pol. The big thing right now is the JetBlue guy. I understand where he’s coming from-rude passengers abound. Lots of heat and fires and flooding around the world. Big surprise there. Looks like Heavy Weather is upon us. And there’s this. My gopod. There is intolerance and then there is intolerance. I like the end of the blog. I saw a bumper sticker today “I hate intolerance” Okayyyy…
Listening to: Veruca Salt, Rush, Brian Eno, Harold Budd, K.M.Krebs, ZZ Top, Emerson, Lake & Palmer, Numun, Kronos Quartet, Peru, Tenacious D, Beastie Boys, Jon & Vangelis, Tuxedomoon, Legendary Pink Dots, Kirtan, Quiet American, Cake, Manu Katche, Bill Bruford, Fugazi, Ladysmith Black Mambazo, Cult, Gil Scott-Heron, Babatunde Olatunji, Alice In Chains, Andy Summers & Robert Fripp, steve roach & vir unis, Cream, Anne Clark, Tchaikovsky, Samuel Barber, iwtv, Vangelis, Rush, Brian Eno, Deep Purple, Umma, Philip Glass, Peter Gabriel, Steve Roach, John Coltrane, Bob Marley, Nina Gordon, Timbuk 3, Chevelle, Steve Roach
2010/8/11
Talking to someone about B of A restructuring. Get in the elevator. Go into a room and look at all the software and books on the wall. There’s an old computer there too.
Did I have something relevant to say?
Every day I copy the next day’s blog template. And every (or most days) all it gets is the list of music I’ve listened to that day. Even though I could end up talking about a lot of stuff, I either run out of time or don’t have anything relevant to say. No matter, that’s the nature of things for me.
OK, so the weekend was pretty uneventful as weekends go-Mathias came home Saturday, we watched part of Avatar until Colin melted down. Sunday we went to the Milwaukie market and Erika stayed up late watching Pride and Prejudice. Yesterday the family visited and we had lunch.
Thursday night, now THAT was eventful. So, I get home, take the train in to downtown. Got off at the fountain-I had to switch trains. Walked up to just past where I would’ve been working at iovation. That would’ve been easy… So, I walk in the bar, we talk about Jim Kucera-bleh. Get a beer, finish up, they want to go barhopping. So we go to this bar/arcade. Play a game, finish up, Al has a huge collection of pinball machines. Go to a gay bar b/c they want Jaeger-blecch. More chat-Al gets upset at a drunk guy bugging him. Go look for food carts. End up at a touristy bar. More chat, then go find the food carts. Chat, eat, say my good byes, get the train, get called-“Where are you?” “On the train.” Get to Gateway, discover no more trains to Clackamas, wait, get a cab to the car, drive home, get busted by the wife. Go to sleep, wake up wishing I hadn’t drank so much. I stopped doing this in the late 90’s…for a good reason.
Listening to: Trance Project, Thupten Pema Lama and Steve Roach, The Pura Paku Alaman Yogyakarta, Robert Fripp, Rusty Crutcher, C.P. McDill, Los Lobos, Chris Breemer, Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds, Echoes Of Nature, Babe The Blue Ox
2010/8/10
In a bar, the Terminator comes in looking for me. I go out the back and find a car. We’re going to the airport. Pick up the kids at school, bump into a car, apologize. At the airport, looking for places the Terminator was for a tour. Go to get out ticket checked-we’re going to Grand Cayman. The kids are running around-Salem is walking away. We go to the main bit-they’re doing construction, it’s crowded. We’re really early, and there’s no gate yet-I ask at the Cayman counter. Erika says we’ve been moved up to an earlier flight.
2010/8/6
Floating down a river, we’re having trouble staying afloat. We were dropped into the river from way high up. Someone is trying to float on a chair. There are waterfalls to one side, and we try to stay away. The water turns into a slide, and we’re getting closer to the waterfalls. We get out and go through a building. They’re having a revival, and we go out the other way.
The Art of Blogging?
The art of blogging? What kind of medium is this? I guess the answer is as individual as posters are. I’ve been doing this for so, so long. If you read back through, what do you see? I can do this easily as I have them all in one huge file. For me, it looks like a diary. I don’t have the most exciting life, so it’s usually just a recitation of events. And here’s the recitation of events. My birthday was last Friday-I’m pushing 50 now. My parents drove up and hung out-they took Mathias up to Seattle for the week. Erika went on a retreat too. I played gamelan at a bridgefest thing Saturday, and went to a church crayfish boil Sunday. Bagged the doomed project-now I have to bill them. Those are the exciting events. The rest is as usual. The blackberries are coming in and I need to pick them, but I’m not. We’re going to play some Lou Harrison pieces for the 30th gamelan concert-we had a guy in to teach us 2 of them-he knows Wenten…Looks like I’m a pretty solid player in this group…Need to make some recordings.
A district court judge invalidated prop 8 in Ca. This is good news. That plus the Arizona immigration decision and another one about a counseling student. And Elena Kagan just got confirmed. The Breitbart thing is amusing and tragic at the same time, much like the ridiculating thing and the reaction to the ground zero islamic center. People are so fixed in their little boxes-that’s why the Steiner stuff is so important. It’s all so very Ahrimanic, no matter what the religious folks say. I’ve been reading interesting things about our economy (more and more), the the prison-industrial system (more) and comments about Prop 8 and Az. And I visited Fox News to see what the brainwashed are saying. Interesting, shocking, and typical seem to be my reactions… It’s good practice on regulating my emotional response and trying to see other points of view, however repugnant to my normal liberal and tolerant sensibility. GOOD is doing some good things on food and health-check them out.
Listening to: Allan Holdsworth, The Art Of Noise, Hafíz Kani Karaca, The Cynic Project, Steven Halpern, Brian Eno, Robert Fripp, Nest, Guns N’ Roses, John Coltrane, Los Lobos, John Coltrane, Delta Nove, Cream, Morphine, Nautical Almanac, Steve Roach, Polyphonic Spree, Legendary Pink Dots, Earth
2010/8/5
Trying to put my skis on and go down the steep, but one has a broken toe piece. I try a few more times and give up.
On a bus/boat, going back from a party. Someone is barfing downstairs and comes up.
2010/8/1
Playing in a yard with the K’s. throwing stuff at each other. Get ready to go.
2010/7/29
At a golf course, drive up and ask if I can play. The guy says OK, and I go get my clubs. There’s a lot of US guys hanging around. Go back and other guys are playing. I walk past and give up. Walk into the clubhouse and there’s a party going on.
2010/7/27
In a house, get Salem something to drink, go downstairs, someone goes into the storeroom-I want to use the toilet there. I wait, then lock the door. People start looking in, laughing, then come in. I start to shove them out and more come. I finally shoo them away, then go out and climb up a hill. I get a hand at the top.
On a train, see Mathias on another train with his class. We wave to each other.
2010/7/24
Walking down tracks-a tornado comes-we have to run to get away but there are more. Hold on and try to get behind a tree.
Going downtown from Shaker Heights, try to take the right road this time. Come to the hill and see a steep road and the tops of project buildings, slide down and go across the road to slow down. Come to the bottom and try to get to another building-go into an aquarium and back out. Into another building, up the elevator.
2010/7/22
In a sewing class, trying to make something. Move 2 machines around and try to get it going. WWalk around and cut some fabric.
2010/7/21
Onstage with Soundgarden. They walk off, I go the other way. We meet up and go to a bar/store. It’s out on 7 mile beach. We leave and they want to go downtown-I tell them it’s over there. I go back and Gary Rossington is playing licks-his tone is amazing. I look at the speakers overhead and it’s a huge horizontal array and swinging. I walk backstage and mention to some guy about the great tone and we guess the effects. I go down a hill to the trucks and look at what’s unloading.
The week is dizzy
Afternoon-got some stuff done. Last night was pretty quiet-watched the Tour, hung out, picked raspberries, ate pizza. Mathias volunteered to clean the cat box! I heard from one of my old roommates-he’s going to be in the Pdx 2 weeks from Weds/Thurs, so I think we’ll have a beer at a local brewpub.
I’m feeling odd. I think it’s the transition to another job. I was suffering from mild dizziness/vertigo for the last few weeks at Hollywood, and I feel like that today. It’s like my head is spinning and a little detached from my body. I need more sleep, for one thing, and I want to forget about the doomed project. Maybe the hot chocolate will help spin up my serotonins. OK. Back to testing-we’ll see how this goes-I have no idea how this fits in-Eclipse does a good job of searching so I should find it.
I really need to work on things when I’m at home-I have to get some exercise, keep the house clean, work on inner development stuff. Also music, practice, playing with the kids. And the goddamn doomed project. I have so much to do and no time. This is where the grant or any of the other stuff would be great. I need some breathing room and I don’t have it.
Listening to: miwa momo hojo, Brian Eno & Jon Hassell, Topology, Dino Pacifici, George Gershwin, Frank Zappa, Philip Glass, Soundgarden, Rage, BBC Sound Effects, BB King, Genesis, Tori Amos, Residents, ELP, Throbbing Gristle, Gentle Giant, Matrix soundtrack, Harold Budd, Vangelis, William S. Burroughs, Peter Gabriel, Maple Cottage Retreat, Rage, Vangelis, Robert Johnson, Art Of Noise, Eno, Hawkwind, Philip Glass, Art Of Noise, Jimi Hendrix, IWTV, Skinny Puppy, Zappa, the Band