Daily posting-6/11/1996

Another week slipped away-and half another one-I think I’m depressed-I sleep all the time and have no motivation…Maybe it’s withdrawal from all the booze and stuff. June 1st weekend was the gamelan concert-it went well-we’re planning some informal practices later in the month… The rest of the week was work-I did go over to the Blue Tue, Thurs & Sat-no drinking, which was wierd. Ken came over here Tuesday to see the place, etc. Sherrie’s birthday Thursday. Met a nice woman Sat-but didn’t get her number-oh well, so what else is new? I flew & practiced golf & slept the rest away. Yesterday was the usual.

6/10/1996

In a car factory doing the deja vu thing with the machinery. Walk around, get stuck elsewhere. In a house, try to take a shower, but some of the rents’ friends are there chatting with me. I finally get the blind around me and someone’s stuck there. Try it-get back to the used part of the factory after years. Chat with an old co-worker.

6/9/1996

Wandering around with a bunch of kids and adults in some kind of transform warp. Go to some hospital for treatment-smoke a heroin cigarette, get into a cop car and drive around.

6/7/1996

At 30700, messing around with mom. She can’t handle it and gets me a magazine for me to find a girl to get off. I sit there and hide to get off.

6/5/1996

Getting chased by communist soldiers who are shooting at us. We go through a few fields and a ravine. The bullets are moving really slow.

6/3/1996

Early for the Weenie Roast, sit in the front row with lunch. I call a hawk that’s flying around. It lands on my arm and starts chewing on my watch. I get it away and it leaves. It comes back, I grab its beak and stare at it.

6/2/1996

In some building, looking down on a tennis court and a racquetball court. Talking to Liv Tyler and others about Merager and Teichrow, for getting more deals. Steve Tyler shows up, I ignore them. Go into the next room to sleep then leave.

Daily posting-5/30/1996

Another week slips away-I haven’t touched NALEO stuff-hopefully this weekend. I also want to fly & do my wash, as well as get my car in the shop. Well, the day is almost ended, another busy day-peed the morning away, visited Custom, bought some stuff at Fry’s, food shopped, and the usual fantasies and frustrations of everyday life…I did successfully resist temptation…

5/27/1996

It’s Sunday, driving around, park in front of some building-the old ladies know me and start asking questions. I park up the street in front of some house. I turn around, they’re having some people over.

Daily posting-5/27/1996

It’s Monday-Memorial day FWIW…Last week ended up as the usual-frantic work, drinking at night. I don’t remember sk8ing home on Fri., and woke up with a MASSIVE hangover, and missed a deadline-this is a MAJOR problem. So…I’m stopping the weeknights out, the partying at Adi’s, etc. I’m restarting the morning/evening stuff, and hopefully even the weekly schedule. I need to tighten the screws on my life, and NOW. I also realized several things over the past two weeks, but not to say here yet. Enough. I need to get this stuff done, and that’s it!

5/26/1996

Playing some vidgame at an airport. Wandering around the runways. Kathy Harrell comes up and asks me to come with her. She takes me to a meeting where she’s going to be initiated. I’ve been trying for this myself and I talk to her handler. Turns out she turned it down when she was younger.

5/25/1996

At a hotel, have to go past cops to get in. Go to wrong room. Rikki Rachtman?!! is in mine, I order a pizza but he wants it from somewhere else.

5/24/1996

At the rents in Pasadena, with all their stuff. We’re talking about splitting up all their stuff when they die, but I want what Holly wants. They have a big thing of Japanese appetizers left over from a meeting-I’m digging them.

Out shopping with ‘rents, looking for tahini, find the last jar in the back. They’re getting ready for a meeting-cleaning up. I find some of my notes and snag them.

Daily posting-5/22/1996

Well, this time at least I’m picking this up sooner–what’s happening is that I don’t use this computer much-I seem to be on the road a lot lately… What’s up? Sunday was a wash-laze, laze. I thought about going to see Candye Kane-didn’t. Monday was WORK until 7, ‘rents, Blue, at Adi’s until 3 or so. Tuesday was off, ACLU, gamelan. Today is work, again. Just picked up weenie roast tix-08Th row! Now, the question is: who will I take???

5/19/1996

Wandering around somewhere looking for someone-Trina Podborowski? I go back and forth and finally find her in a bar that’s closed. We talk and I try to find out that happened to her. I go looking for her connection as we’re trying to put a deal together. She says she’ll do it.

I’m in a small town with Diane, she’s trying to pick out a new car. I’m trying to talk her into coming with me. There’s a Ralph’s there and I go shopping. I pay by Visa and have to dig for my license.

I’m in a college city, wandering through the building. Go into the US libe and walk through the stacks.

5/18/1996

In an office with some people I don’t know. I’m a witch or a vampire or something, talking about others. Some funky plant comes up and attaches itself to you to breed. l I cut it off and into little bits. Some guy is worried about being found out.

Daily posting-5/16/1996

Guess what-I haven’t picked this up for ANOTHER THREE WEEKS…So what else is new. I’ve been so busy, but with a complete lack of early-morning work, motivation or direction. In someways I’m free running… So what has happened? Work, as usual, laze, as usual, spi stuff, as usual, the Blue, as usual, Adi/Wolf’s, as usual, I bought a notebook, some music & some perfume. I’m becoming more female by the day. Just a matter of time before I start wearing dresses… I’m having some interesting spi stuff. I can access all points up to the eye chakra, though just access, no real balance or control or ability. I have to force myself back to the heart, as that’s where I REALLY need to balance everything out. It’s working, though I have some difficulty controlling the upward flow-I’m so used to just letting it go up without bounds-PRACTICE… See ‘ya